Add source Login
Archaeologists: D.C. Capitol May Have Once Been Used For Legislating

Archaeologists: D.C. Capitol May Have Once Been Used For Legislating

WASHINGTON—Calling the discovery the “clearest proof yet” of how the U.S. government was originally designed to function, archaeologists published new evidence Thursday that suggests the Capitol building in Washington, D.C., may have once been used for legislating. In their academic paper, the researchers wrote that the sprawling, 540-room marble complex contained conclusive proof that a […] The post Archaeologists: D.C. Capitol May Have Once Been Used For Legislating appeared first on The Onion .

Foreskin Scrapbooked

Foreskin Scrapbooked

MILL VALLEY, CA—Having proudly removed the piece of shriveled penile flesh from its bag and laid it next to her large selection of craft supplies, local mother Emily Taylor spent the afternoon scrapbooking her son’s foreskin, wincing sources reported Tuesday. According to witnesses, the foreskin, which had belonged to her 6-day-old infant son before being snipped […] The post Foreskin Scrapbooked appeared first on The Onion .

You’re Bidding Against BlackRock

You’re Bidding Against BlackRock

This charming property offers the perfect blend of comfort and convenience, which is exactly why it’s going to be purchased by the world’s largest asset manager. Good luck! Maybe they’ll rent it to you. Reference #68370 The post You’re Bidding Against BlackRock appeared first on The Onion .

You’re Bidding Against Blackstone

You’re Bidding Against Blackstone

This charming property offers the perfect blend of comfort and convenience, which is exactly why it’s going to be purchased by the world’s largest asset manager. Good luck! Maybe they’ll rent it to you. Reference #68370 The post You’re Bidding Against Blackstone appeared first on The Onion .